johnfn's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Moving Slowly]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

This is a cool start to a song. I definitely like the core melodic motif and the associated chord progression. However I have to admit that it's certainly far too repetitive as it stands right now - the song really only has two sections, as you mentioned. Furthermore, the mixing really needs some love, as all the elements need to have their volumes adjusted (the piano is way too loud, the crash is too dry, and in general the climax mix simply has too many instruments in it. Try using fewer that pull their weight more!

All in all, a cool start to a song. Try varying it up and going a little more minimalistic next time! =)

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 2/4
Composition: 2/4
Sound Design: 1+/4
Production: 1/4

Overall: 5.3

BlujayTunes responds:

I definitely agree with the things you pointed out! I will improve. See you next year!

[Abstrack - Volcano Dive]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

This is a good start to an electro track. I definitely like the start with the atmospheric plucks - the song starts on a very cool and moody note. I also like the chord progression in the solo.

However, there's quite a bit to work on here! First off, as you guessed, is mixing. The mix in the climax is just all over the place. It needs a solid bass in the bottom to really be effective, and it doesn't really sound that 'full' - try comparing side to side with other electro tracks to see where you can improve. Additionally, the arrangement really needs some love - just copy and pasting the same thing twice in a song might work somewhere, but definitely won't work on a contest submission track! We notice that kind of stuff ;-)

All in all, nice start to a track, and I encourage you to continue working! It might be interesting to hear you attempt an ambient piece since your strengths currently seem to lie in that direction =)

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 2/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 2+/4
Production: 2/4

Score: 6.4

Abstrack responds:

I agree with almost everything here. After thinking to what you said, I found the big mixing problem here is in fact the bass... its volume is too high (so it takes too much place), and because of its shape (sinus) and its frequency (too low), it becomes almost inaudible and lower the volume of others instruments. Maybe should I try turning off the global limiter...? (^^ Maybe not if you want to keep your listening skills xD)

Where I half agree is the "copy-past" argument. I confess I did firstly copy & past the "drops" (if I can call them so). But on the resulting 2nd part (the sadly-not-professionnal duplication), I changed almost all backgroud instrument patterns (added / removed some notes / slip-notes, added void holes on drum kicks) and effects. So I didn't really copy-past at the end. I think the big problem here is that the main melody takes too much place in the "drops", so we don't hear well other instruments... That said, I'm probably gonna re-upload this song without the main instrument.

Anyways, very helpful review. Thanks a lot! :D

[Never To Have Love]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Wow, this song is beautiful.

First of all, I ADORE your vocal harmonies. I think as soon as I heard you sing the first harmony I was hooked and also amazed, and the song only really improved from there. I can't even think of other songs that do 3 part harmonies off the top of my head... maybe the Beatles, or some psychedelic music, I dunno... but like, your harmonies are so effective everywhere. The harmonies in the chorus are a different style, but they're really good too.

While I'm praising stuff, allow me to also praise your composition and melody writing. It's all excellent. There isn't a single bad melody in here. The chorus is great, the verse is great. I like it all. The song is very sombre and thoughtful and pensive in the way that you'd imagine a song about a breakup to be.

I actually find it hard to believe that you're still mixing this down with just pure Audacity. Dude, if you are looking for a sign that you're good enough to use a better DAW, LET THIS BE IT. Your songwriting is great and it could REALLY be helped by all the additional stuff that a decent DAW can afford you, like more instruments to add into the song, greater ease of mixing, etc etc etc. The advantages are too many to really list.

My biggest problem with this track is the slow and plodding speed of it all. When I first saw it was verse/chorus, I was hoping that the chorus would speed up the track a little bit. Unfortunately, if anything, the chorus is even slower than the verse, stripping away even more layers and high passing your vocals. If the song was only a single verse and a single chorus, I think that it would have worked, but unfortunately as it is I get kinda tired of the same thing again once we launch into the second verse and chorus. Don't get me wrong, the melodies and harmonies are great, but it's too much of the same, you know? I would have LOVED to hear you ramp up your harmonies even more for the final chorus, like really fill out that mix!

My other problems with this song are mainly minor. I think that the guitar tone is pretty thin and definitely needs a better recording. Also, the guitar drumming at 1:20 and a few other places is just goofy, it doesn't sound good at all and should definitely be replaced with something else.

All in all, great track, just let down a little by the arrangement and slow tempo.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 3/4
Composition: 4+/4
Sound Design: 3+/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 9.0

kynivoid responds:

Wow, I dunno what to say except thank you! For both the criticisms and compliments all the same. I definitely agree my stuff could use more variety, and I feel ya on the goofy guitar drumming. Looking back on it, it is not the best thing I could have put there. I'm really not working with much so I guess I just look around for whatever sounds I can make and add to a song. I'll try to look for a better DAW, but I'm very very VERY new to this whole music thing (so new that I had to look up what DAW meant). So I don't know what programs and equipment are good for this sorry of thing and I'm also very broke haha.

Anyway, thanks a lot for the review! I'm sad, I couldn't make it to the final round of NGUAC, but I'm glad I at least received a good and constructive review! :)

[Market Day (KindLing A0S1)]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Jesus, this is not an easy track to review. It's like, 6 tracks in one or something lord almighty

Can we just talk about your composition a little bit? Because every time I start thinking that the composition is faltering, you hit me with a jawdropping progression or melody line, but right when I get into it it's gone and it'll probably never appear again. Like, let's just listen to the first 30 seconds. We start out with a little piano arp idea, and then this music box which is playing a really nice progression but the melody line itself doesn't really do anything all that interesting and kind of goes around aimlessly... until suddenly HOLY F- that chromatic descent thingy at 0:24 is out of this world!... and then it goes away and isn't repeated or anything. (At least you brought it back later in the song.) And this is basically how I feel about the entire track, like you have a bunch of melodically OK stuff and then suddenly BOOM when you least expect it an amazing idea hits.

Or like the idea at 2:24, which is totally beautiful, but then instead of sitting there for a while and fleshing it out, you just speed up the tempo and go onto another section instead. WHY??? Let your good ideas play themselves out!

A bunch of people mention 1f1n1ty in the reviews, so may as well address the elephant in the room. You two definitely have very similar styles, basically sounding like you both just glued multiple songs together with snazzy transitions ;-) I certainly am not opposed to it, and it's definitely preferable to the opposite thing where people will just write a single pattern and loop it for 5 minutes and submit it to the NGUAC. ;-) However, the multi-part song glued together is a hard balance to strike for anyone, because IMO songs just can't transition between ideas endlessly: they actually have to feel like the individual sections can stand on their own rather than moving between place to place so fast. And that's what I feel like the biggest problem of this song is - it's so many different ideas that are each great but you move between them so quickly that I can never properly sink my teeth into any one.

While I'm griping, I figure I should briefly mention the mix and sound design. While obviously the focus of this track is on the excellent compositional work, other judges will probably hammer you for these two things. First, a number of the instruments just sound flat out fake, with the guitar at 0:55 being a prime offender, especially on the trills - try varying the loudness of it. The violins in faster sections are also a large problem - try to use legato if possible. Furthermore, the mix often threatens to go into a 'large' section, such as the rapid violin idea leading into 1:13, but the mix never really backs it up, so it's kind of a letdown.

So overall, excellent work that is unfortunately let down by a rapidly shifting arrangement.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 3/4
Composition: 3+/4
Sound Design: 2+/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 8.4

Miyolophone responds:

Thanks for the detailed review, johnfn! I'll try to make my final round entry less frantic and dismissive with its melodic material, and I'll do what I can to work around the fake-sounding instruments.

[Snapshot]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

I think that the opening to this track was probably my favorite section. The little pluck melody is a pretty neat one, and it has a cool melodic contour to it. (Although I'd have to say that it was probably a bit too loud compared to the backing instruments at that point in the song).

Unfortunately, once we get into the rest of the song, in particular the two drops, stuff kinda breaks down and stops being enjoyable to me. Like, at 1:22, the rhythmic pad texture just doesn't work for me at all, and the melody on the pluck isn't enough to save it. I appreciate the switchup into a second section with 1:35, but I have to say that the melody is not effective, the sound design is kind of harsh and in fact some of the notes such as 1:42-43 sound out-of-key.

The sound design around 1:47 with those freaking cool sounding drums is really neat though, I have to say. It's really hard for me to break down your sound design as a whole, because, parts of it are REALLY cool, like the aforementioned drums, plus the drum kit at 2:15, and most of the pad sounds. The music-box like pluck around 2:30 is really nice, and who doesn't love ambient children like around 2:44? Some of the other sounds, though, like the leads and harsher pads e.g. 2:59 just aren't working for me.

The mix and overall production quality were great, however, and the production feels particularly rich. One exception is that there isn't really a lot of sub bass in this song, and I think that could have helped fill out the mix.

All in all, good track, but some unfortunate sound design choices really jarred me and there wasn't enough in the composition to really make up for it.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 3+/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 3/4
Production: 3+/4

Overall: 7.7

EtzerGD responds:

Thanks a ton! I appreciate all these reviews since I am starting to piece together more and more which parts of the songs need work and which need less work. Really like the breakdown of all the stuff you gave me, thanks for the indepth review, I'll keep it all in mind!

[Zyzyx - Screw Physics]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Ohhhh yaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

So yeah let's get it out of the way, the production quality on this one is just absolutely A++++ stellar. Honestly I was pretty sure that the production was going to be amazing as soon as I heard that chip lead in the beginning that was so tasty, with all the right amounts of vibrato and modulation. The bass is huge, but not offensively so. The chords are awesome, and you use a lot of white noise tastefully (particularly in the drops) to really give the song an airy and huge feel to it.

Once the song dropped, I was *really* impressed. All the crazy cool bass instruments going all over the place, along with a lead soloing which you somehow crammed into the mix... It's very cool stuff.

The chord progression that you laid down on the piano at 2:40 was really cool. At first I was just like, yawn, this is just IV-V-vi-I, heard it before, but then on the second loop you turned the vi into a VI and I was like whoa. THEN, you went to a I with an add 9, wtf, that's awesome, it has such a great feel to it! You could build another song just out of that cool progression.

Now if I were to complain about this song, and I will, because it's my job, then I'd say that the melodic aspect of the composition is lacking a bit. Like, the chip synth intro, or the cool synth instrument that plays over the drop - they all *sound* cool, they have great sound design, but they don't really do any interesting melodic stuff, it kinda just sounds aimless. Maybe try varying up their rhythms more? I dunno, melody is hard.

I notice a lot of people griping because it sounds like Virtual Riot. I'll be honest, I've never listened to them, so I wouldn't know if it does or not, BUT the fact that you produced and mixed this so well, as well as the fact that you modulated and arranged everything so well, takes this music well beyond the realm of copycat. In time you will develop your own style (and then those guys will find something else to complain about...)

So, yeah. Overall impression is that in production you knocked it out of the park, but the compositional aspects definitely need a bit of work.

Also dude, rhodes outro oooo yeaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh haha you could make yet another song out of this... bringing the total number of songs in this song to... 3... ???

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 4/4
Composition: 3/4
Sound Design: 4+/4
Production: 4+/4

Overall: 8.9

DJ-Zyzyx responds:

Thank you so much john :D I appreciate the kind words, really makes me want to make more stuff. I definitely agree, the chords don't really vary that much at all throughout the drops lol

[Jacques Melissa - Screw everything]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

rofl

Okay so I have to say, I don't think I've ever heard a song that is so all over the place. Some parts make me kind of sad, like the really bare and hard velocity piano that plays by itself at points. On the other hands, some parts of this song are just freaking amazing, like the builds to the drop and the drops themselves. Let me just talk about how cool the drops are for a bit. They are just so interesting - they have so many elements working on harmony. I think that's a particularly difficult thing to get down, it already sounds in your track awesome, and I can't wait to hear what your stuff sounds like as you continue to refine your skills!

Not only that, but I really have difficulty categorizing this track, it's so unique. It's not trap, not dance, not dubstep, not glitch... It's so weird and unique, but so enjoyable to listen to! I don't really give bonus points for stuff I've never heard before, but this track probably got a higher score unconsciously since the uniqueness makes it a more enjoyable listen.

I feel like the vocals are pretty good, but are also a bit of a missed opportunity. Like the education/civilization rhyme line has a really great rhythm to it, and I wish you carried it on further - but then the next few lines are so rhythmically flat that I wonder if it was just a mistake or something. A lot of the words sound weirdly cut off, which definitely doesn't help the rhythm either.

While I'm complaining, there are a few other things that really bug me. Like I mentioned before, the piano is a giant freaking sore thumb, mainly because of the tone, but also because it sounds like it's being played by a robot. You could just remove it entirely from this song and improve it, but I'd recommend varying the loudness of the piano and varying up the tone a little better to get a tone that fits better in the song. The crash cymbal, also, is a bit of a problem - it's far too dry. Perhaps more reverb could help here.

But in summary? The best part of this track is that it's just enjoyable to listen to. The mix is exactly in the right spot, the rhythms are funky and fresh, it's got a groove, the vocal chops are just going bonkers, it's just FUN.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 4/4
Composition: 3+/4
Sound Design: 3+/4
Production: 4/4

Overall: 8.9

Jakki responds:

yeah the vocals were like "let's make something bizarre and offending, this is seriously a good idea lol" and the next day I released it I was like "lol it totally wasn't a good idea"

Cheers for the positive feedback, I will definitely consider these next time I do stuff. Thaaanks

[Shades]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Oooooooooooohhh what a cool track!

I was loving your composition practically from the first chord change. I love so much the subtle dissonance and eeriness that it suggests. To be honest, I'm a big fan of your entire intro (which I'd say is the first 2 minutes). It's really a treat for geeks like me that love intriguing chord progressions and harmonic choices. =D The subtle rubato, the funky instrument choices (love the marimba and subtle backbeat, though admittedly not a fan of the organ tone).

Right at 2:00 the song kind of implodes on itself - unfortunately not in a really good way. The chording guitar tone is just so ugly, it doesn't mesh well with the rest of the song at all. The compositional aspects of the song continue to be good, but at this point it's hard to truly get into them when the sound design is so difficult to get over. The guitar solo is good, but I just can't understand what you're trying to do with it. It's far too quiet in the mix to really stand out, but it's too complex to serve as a backing track.

When the *real* breakbeat starts to come in at around 2:35 ish (it fades in, hard to pick an exact time), I found myself desperately wishing for a better mix so that it could shine through better. As it is, your breakbeat is a fantastic idea that falls completely flat due to the mix.

I have to admit, I don't understand what you were thinking at 3:30. That section is just crazily dissonant to me and does not really do much other than make me confused. If that's what you meant by 'lose some points'... well... okay, I admit, I just have no idea what you were thinking!

All in all, this piece is compositionally fascinating, with lots of intriguing chord choices and harmonies. I'm a huge fan of almost exactly the first two minutes, but after that the mix really starts to fall apart. It's a shame, because your ambition and ideas are really interesting, and if they were properly mixed this piece would be super duper good. As it is, it's a really really intriguing experiment, and certainly a very original and fascinating track.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 3+/4
Composition: 3+/4
Sound Design: 2+/4 (higher in the first half)
Production: 2/4 (ditto)

Overall: 7.9

Azhthar responds:

Whoot? I thought I already responded to your review... Acutally I wrote a really long response, yesterday. Weird that it wasn´t posted. First: Thanks a lot for that awesome detailed review and a lot of constructive feedback! I´m glad you liked the track! For the organ tone and the tone of the chording guitar. I actually tweaked a lot till I got these sounds. The organ I wanted to have bit more "flutey", sounding a bit less like church (only a little bit). The guitar I wanted to have as distorted and "evil" as it could be. You are completely right about my mixing, though... I think this is always my biggest flaw. I really don´t know how to get these breakbeats a bit more out, except by making them louder or using more limiting which will just distort them. I already panned every single hit very strongly to place them around the rest of the music. I´m also always really intrigued to hear all these awesome produced tracks, which sound so bright, airy and clear. The only way I found to get the sound this bright is to use multiband compression and increasing the gain of the high frequencies. I don´t like this sound, though and it disturbs the atmosphere of music, which is intended to have a darker undertone. If you have any suggestions how to improve my production in specific, I would be really happy to hear it! I´m a bit surprised that you think the solo guitar should be louder, because I always think it´s too loud, when I listen to the track again... Yes, the section at 3:30 is a bit special. It was more about the storytelling than about the music I guess and also maybe was meant as a small joke. Maybe I shouldn´t do these things in a competition ;)
I´m really glad that you figured out all these small treats like the rubatos or the backbeat I layered behind this 6/8 meter to shift it to a 4/4 beat with strong triplets ;)
Again: Thanks a lot for your detailed contructive feedback! I hope I didn´t forget anything what I wrote yesterday...

[Serenity]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Wow, this is quite the electronic track. I definitely get the impression that you did your hardest to make your absolute best track, and I think that all your work has paid off.

First off, the mixing here is really good. Right from the beginning with those rich and large piano chords I knew I was in for a well mixed treat. The two drops do not disappoint in the slightest - the pad sounds are equally huge and full sounding. If I were to complain, I might say that the drums are a bit quiet, but it doesn't detract from my listening experience. The chord progressions that you chose are satisfying without feeling overused.

I hear a lot of people complaining that vocal chops are overused; I disagree. From a sound design perspective, I think they add a great texture to your track. The vocal chop *melody*, however, seemed a bit random and it definitely doesn't feel like it's pushing the song in any direction or has any sort of satisfying groove to it.

The piano breakdown at 2:10 is definitely a good idea, and helps balance out the energy of the track, but to me it sounds a bit too robotic (try varying how hard you hit the notes) and the rhythms of the notes are a bit too straightforward. This is a criticism I would like to extend to your entire track, actually - the vocal chop rhythm is too simple, as is the melody in the drop on the square wave thingy.

Speaking of the square wave lead in the drop, I can't help but feel like it's a bit of a missed opportunity. Currently it's played a little too 'straight' for me to really get into it. The rhythms could be more interesting, and there could also be a lot more modulation on the synth - adding vibrato would be an EASY win to make a better melody here, but pitch bend, filter cutoff, or even modulation of other parameters would also help to give more life to that synth.

While talking about the drop, I can't help but notice that even outside of the synth the entire thing is rhythmically kind of... boring. Try adding in hihats with interesting rhythms, or plucks or other details to add more complexity to the rhythm.

Let's talk a little about arrangement. On one hand, I feel like you did such an excellent job with builds, breakdowns, and adding/removing elements that it pains me to score you low in this category, since you clearly understand arrangement very well. On the other, I feel like this song is just too long - like, you explore the same idea for too long, the two drops basically sound the same, and you desperately need to switch up the chord progression. I eventually decided to dock points because I really don't feel like the arrangement is pulling the weight it needs to be. The drops need to be varied up more, and you need to either explore more chord progressions OR shorten the song to keep it maximally interesting.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 2+/4
Composition: 3/4
Sound Design: 3+/4
Production: 4/4

Overall: 8.5

8-bitheroes responds:

Thanks for the detailed feedback. I agree with some of those points like how some vibrato would of added some extra spice to the melody. You mention other forms of modulation such as pitch bend which if you listen carefully to the lead i have applied pitch bend/slide in strategic places. Personally its not and effect i like to overdo though.

I totally agree about about the note velocity thing, it could do with a little more humanising. In terms of note rhythm during the piano parts to be fair im not a pianist, not even close and therefore when i write a piano melody or part i dont think like one.

I dont really see how the drops can be rhymically boring however, granted its not in an odd time sig or anything crazy but hey its future bass...however I used bongos sparingly in the drop to add extra rhythmic interest along with lots of drum fills/background arp/pluck too and pauses/rests between chords to create more groove.
The two drops are the same though and this is something i struggle with in all my songs because once i have written the first drop im usually too spent to do another one that sounds fresh.

[Technically Explored (V1)]

ooh this was fun stuff! reminds me of legend of zelda for no reason i can put my finger on.

i love the idea of using a staccato piano note as bass. such a fun idea! gives the whole piece a slightly non-serious tone to it =D

i felt like the mix was very dry at points

it definitely gets into something great around 2:00, i only wish you had expanded upon that idea more!

ConnorGrail responds:

Funny you mentioned Zelda, Breath of the Wild was a major influence as I was working on this one.
Glad you liked what you heard, and I definitely plan to continue developing this one outside of the contest deadline! Gotta tighten up that mix and arrangement for sure.
Thanks for the good feedback!