This just embarrasses me with how much better it is than my own piano work. Lovely sense of melody and chords. And it's all done in one take you say? hrrrnnngggg
This just embarrasses me with how much better it is than my own piano work. Lovely sense of melody and chords. And it's all done in one take you say? hrrrnnngggg
I listened to Snowy Night and think it is really nice! Great improv skills are a matter of practice, and you are certainly on the right track. I don't know if this is helpful to you, but here are a few tips to improve improv skills:
-Spend some time improvising to a metronome to get in the habit of not pausing to think. If you mess up, just keep going.
-Focus an improv around a certain aspect. This could be a specific chord progression, accompaniment pattern, melodic technique (like using chromatic neighbor tones), dynamic shape, texture, or something else.
-Improvise in as many different keys. This is the one that I struggle with. Sure, you can always use the transpose button on a keyboard, but there is a more important goal to playing in different keys. It allows your hands to break free of cliche chord progressions that you are used to and eventually begin switching keys mid-song. It improves your technique. If you stumble and play a funky chord, it helps allow you to use that chord as a key change tool or interesting harmony and make it sound intentional.
Thanks for your review!
Some assorted thoughts:
I often hear a riser in the song, like at 2:27, but it doesn't rise TO anything, if that makes sense. When I hear a riser I expect a buildup and then a "drop" of some sort on the other side, but that's not happening here.
At 2:37 I understand what's going on - you're doing call and response with the piano and synth. I think this was hard for me to understand at first because the synth does not feel like a lead instrument like the piano does. I can't really explain why - it's something about how the synth sounds.
The chords are quite jarring to me because they move around so fast. You normally only expect one chord per 4 measures, except under rare circumstances that are justified by a complex melody. I would say that for now, try to follow this rule - and then once you feel comfortable with it, try breaking it :)
At around 1:07 I'm feeling like the song is lacking a lot of coherence. Like, one thing happens, and then another thing happens, and then another idea comes, and they don't seem related too much. I think one way to fix this problem would just be to use some sort of pad instrument to "glue" the song together. Pads do a great job of making a tune sound coherent.
The melodies are also kind of random.
I have a challenge for you that might fix this problem of randomness and coherence. What I want you to do is write a song that has a melody and then has variations on that melody. There are a lot of fun "tricks" you can do to make melodic variations. One of the easiest (and most successful - great musicians are doing this ALL THE TIME) is to take an initial melodic idea (say you play E-F-G on the chord of C major), then transpose it (say to A-B-C on the chord of F major) and have that transposition follow right after. Or I could do something after E-F-G and then play the transposition.
Check out the tune "Seeing Other People" by Belle and Sebastian for an example of this - oh my god, so many transpositions - and yet it sounds awesome.
Another fun way to do variations is to play the same melody under different chords. Say I do C-D-E in the chord of C major. Sounds happy! Now I play it in the chord of A minor - sounds sad. :(
(Obviously your melodies will probably be longer than 3 notes... mine are 3 notes just for the sake of readable examples...)
I also want you to focus on melody. Sad thing is that there's no shortcut to get better at melody except tons of practice.
Overall I thought it was an improvement! I don't mean this to sound so negative, I just notice a lot of things that I can suggest to improve! For comparisons sake, if I go back and listen to, say, Lily's Theme, I think you've made definite strides. Keep it up!
Well, this is a fantastic review, Johnfn, so thank you SO much for all the careful thought you evidently put into it. ;D About the "riser," I was just trying to smooth out some transitions, but I'll try to think more about leading somewhere with them. I can also understand your disorientation with the lead and piano. For some reason, Autogun sounds different in NG's project system than it does in FL Studio, if that's any defense. I agree with you about the jarring chords, especially at 2:59. I suppose I just tried to keep it a little TOO engaging. Thanks for your advice about the pads. I think I need to stop using random Garageband loops in my songs. XD I agree that my melodies tend to be...random. I'll keep working at it. Thanks so much for your advice, Johnfn! :D I really appreciate the support! ;D
I essentially disagree completely with Rahmemhotep. First of all, the production is immaculate. I'm always impressed by the amount of energy that you can inject into these cinematic pieces. I think that the main secret is those brass blasts that you're doing all over the place, but there's a lot more to it than that. Another key is definitely the big boomy hits. Reminds me of The Festival all over again. That piece rocks by the way. I mean, I already told you that, but... yeah.
But getting back to that main point, your tracks seem to have this Step-esque sheen to them that moves them along and makes them captivating. While I can't quite put my finger on what it is (because it's a bunch of different things), rest assured that the overall affect is awesome.
Though now that I think about it (and now that I think of The Festival again) I notice that there really isn't any bass in this piece to speak of. Yeah, there's a string droning out the root note, but nothing really interesting other than that. I don't think that's a particular problem, since this piece is pretty focused on the high end blasts and flutes and (yes!) dan tranh, but you should realize that there's a possibility to do more. I know that in pieces like Polargeist you've done some cool bass grooves.
The hilarious thing about this song is that although it was written to be a demo for the dan tranh, I actually feel like it's out of place in the song! Like, it just kinda randomly meanders its way through the song and doesn't add all that much. Again, I'm not saying that it's *bad*... but if you got rid of it, I probably wouldn't even notice. (Though I'm not sure if those shakey things - can't think of another way to describe them - at :22 and elsewhere are the dan tranh. I like those.) I can't help but think that perhaps the dan tranh is a more intimate instrument, suited to a more stripped down arrangement.
Now... I said that I disagreed completely with Rahmemhotep, so you know what's coming next: the melody! Yes, I have a one track mind, and it's always focused on melody. Now, since we are basically the same person when it comes to listening to music, I know that you already know what I'm going to say. And since there's no way I can suggest you to improve a melody, I don't even know why I bring it up. Still though, yeah, the melody isn't all too interesting. I know that you have written good melodies before (Festival and Sky's the Limit come to mind immediately) and I can understand time constraints, but, you know. I'm contractually obliged to complain about it.
Overall, I enjoy it a lot. I'm impressed by how high quality your pieces are. The melody is holding me back a little, but other than that, it's pro.
Finally (and the true reason for me writing this review comes out! ...not really), I want to YELL AT YOU. It's been like 2 months since you wrote this piece, and that is FAR TOO LONG. Nah, I don't want to berate you. I understand you're super busy with college, (when I went to college I stopped producing for quite a while) so just know that I will just be sitting here impatiently, waiting for you to find some free time. :)
Aw man I just love your reviews. As you said, we agree on just EVERYTHING. I'd say "commence operation quote response" but it'll be more like "commence operation quote agreement". LET'S GO.
"First of all, the production is immaculate. I'm always impressed by the amount of energy that you can inject into these cinematic pieces. I think that the main secret is those brass blasts that you're doing all over the place, but there's a lot more to it than that."
I think one of the secrets to it is just to make the piece really detailed and full of intricate things, since I find that, with a decently quick tempo, it can really add some energy. Plus, of course, the brass blasts and crescendos upon crescendos probably help a little too :3.
"Another key is definitely the big boomy hits. Reminds me of The Festival all over again. That piece rocks by the way. I mean, I already told you that, but... yeah."
Yeah I'm kinda proud of The Festival. I wasn't at first since the intro was a little boring and two other musicians told me that the second part is too bouncy and upbeat, but it kinda grew on me a little.
"But getting back to that main point, your tracks seem to have this Step-esque sheen to them that moves them along and makes them captivating. While I can't quite put my finger on what it is (because it's a bunch of different things), rest assured that the overall affect is awesome."
Cool. Yeah, I can hear that Step-esque thing too. I find that the less inspired I am while making the track, the more it sounds like generic Step music haha.
"Though now that I think about it (and now that I think of The Festival again) I notice that there really isn't any bass in this piece to speak of. Yeah, there's a string droning out the root note, but nothing really interesting other than that. I don't think that's a particular problem, since this piece is pretty focused on the high end blasts and flutes and (yes!) dan tranh, but you should realize that there's a possibility to do more. I know that in pieces like Polargeist you've done some cool bass grooves."
It's actually pretty tough to add a lot of bass to orchestral tracks, since while there are bass-dedicated orchestral instruments, it's not as easy to get a powerful low end from them unless you do some EQing. I'm pretty conservative when it comes to adding bass to melodic instruments though. I like to leave space for the drums as I'm sure you noticed. But yeah I agree, I could've added some really low bass without making the track sound too beefy, and I could've definitely made the bass more interesting than just playing the root note. It's become a bad habit.
"The hilarious thing about this song is that although it was written to be a demo for the dan tranh, I actually feel like it's out of place in the song! Like, it just kinda randomly meanders its way through the song and doesn't add all that much. Again, I'm not saying that it's *bad*... but if you got rid of it, I probably wouldn't even notice. ... I can't help but think that perhaps the dan tranh is a more intimate instrument, suited to a more stripped down arrangement."
Yes, exactly. I admit I had to force the instrument in at times just for the sake of having a demo. I think it sounds great and I loved working with it, but yes it's entirely suited for more intimate pieces. Still, samulis told me that my track's good because it shows that it's possible to make cinematic stuff with the VST, which, for the purpose of a demo, is a pretty good marketing characteristic.
"(Though I'm not sure if those shakey things - can't think of another way to describe them - at :22 and elsewhere are the dan tranh. I like those.)"
Yeah! That's a tremolo patch from the dan tranh, when you finger the same note quickly and consistently.
"Now... I said that I disagreed completely with Rahmemhotep, so you know what's coming next: the melody! Yes, I have a one track mind, and it's always focused on melody. Now, since we are basically the same person when it comes to listening to music, I know that you already know what I'm going to say. And since there's no way I can suggest you to improve a melody, I don't even know why I bring it up. Still though, yeah, the melody isn't all too interesting. I know that you have written good melodies before (Festival and Sky's the Limit come to mind immediately) and I can understand time constraints, but, you know. I'm contractually obliged to complain about it."
Totally understandable. Yeah I'm not a huge fan of the melody here either. I need more time to be able to make a good melody haha.
"Overall, I enjoy it a lot. I'm impressed by how high quality your pieces are. The melody is holding me back a little, but other than that, it's pro.
Aw yissss. Thanks!
"Finally (and the true reason for me writing this review comes out! ...not really), I want to YELL AT YOU. It's been like 2 months since you wrote this piece, and that is FAR TOO LONG. Nah, I don't want to berate you. I understand you're super busy with college, (when I went to college I stopped producing for quite a while) so just know that I will just be sitting here impatiently, waiting for you to find some free time. :)"
Yeah, uni actually not college. It is so impossible to find time! Factoring in time spent waiting for/taking the bus to uni and time spent on campus, on Monday I've got from 10:00 AM till 1 PM and then from 2:00 PM till 7:00 PM. On Tuesday I've got from 8:00 AM till 5:00 PM (used to be 7:00 PM), then from Wednesday till Friday it's 5:30 AM till 8:00 PM (with Friday being till 6:00 PM instead of 8:00 PM).
Then on Saturday I've got piano and my little brother's friend comes over and wants to play Minecraft with my brother on my PC and laptop. Then on Sunday I'm at my grandparents since we go and visit them every Sunday. And then the cycle starts all over again.
It's not that there's a lot of work because I spend a lot of time on campus sitting at lectures with crappy lecturers who don't project their voice enough and don't explain properly (so basically a waste of time), and also a lot of time in the study area either playing some game or working. Our timetable is really spaced out with like 1 - 4 hour gaps between lectures, full of crappy lecturers, and couple that with the terrible bus system and you've got a lot of time wasted, even if the workload isn't huge.
Anyway, sorry for the mini rant :3. I've got another track in the works but it's just generic boring stuff for a pretty cool game and I'm not really proud of it either haha.
THANKS for the awesome review. You, Buoy and SkyeWintrest are my three favourite audio reviewers out there, just so you know!
Which one of these is the most unlikely?
1. You continue to post music on Newgrounds 10 years after joining.
2. I continue to review your stuff 10 years after my first review on one of your songs.
3. This song, written 10 years later, is still awesome.
I'm not even sure if you remember me but somehow I remember spamming a bunch of your songs 10 years ago with reviews. I thought they had a really interesting and tasty vibe to them back then (and, relistening to them now, they still do. Your approach to the whole music deal was always really interesting, with a focus on melody and atmosphere over production), and honestly you've probably had a big (mostly subconscious) influence on the way that I eventually took my music.
And listening to this one... it's pretty much the same deal as your older stuff, except a lot more mature.
Wow this song is really interesting though, it's so dark! The chord progression is this twisty thing. Something I've been noticing is that you're really into using high pitched noises to fill out the song. And it's really a cool idea, it makes me imagine stars. That bass sounds like a dubby sort of idea, but it's not obnoxious, it just adds to the creepy atmosphere. The atmosphere is just wild, filled with all sorts of little plinky ideas that come and go.
Anyway, of all the people who did leave from 10 years ago, I'm really glad that you're around and writing music. Though honestly? Could you write more than one song a year? ;-) This stuff is so inventive that I would love to hear more.
I'd say the most unlikely would be that i would come back to the site and check to see if my songs have been reviewed. bless you Johnfn for this incredibly revitalizing and inspiring review. I recognize the absence of music production in my life and it's been a wild last 4 years since i posted this one. I took up traveling with no laptop till this current moment....you know what that means.
Ive always loved dancing and making music to make me jump up out of my chair and throw myself around all rag doll style.
I've grown nostalgic for newgrounds and the boost it gave me to production. Near the end i just got too busy and life seemed more important than 1's and 0's .
now that i've come to these ol haunts your message creates that spark i need to stoke this puppy .
thank you. and yes your request of more than one song a year is a good one :)
I remember when you write "She Was Picking Flowers" I was all like "you need to work on your melodies." Well GOOD JOB proving me wrong - the melodies in this song are great. Each great section leads into another, equally great section. I'm actually amazed (and slightly jealous) you were able to think of so many good ideas all in the space of 2 weeks. Alright, I may not enjoy like one or two of the sections, and I'm only ambivalent about the main theme (and this is weird, because Step said it was great and I almost never disagree with him), but the awesomeness of most of the melodies easily make up for the one or two ones that I don't like.
Can I commend you in particular on the 2:55 section which is just great. (Also... dat switch between 5/4 and 3/4... so effortlessly executed ;.; I'm jealous of your command over different time sigs. I didn't even notice weird things were going on until I started paying really close attention)
I agree with the others in that I definitely had a hard time grasping the structure of the piece. After listening to it a lot, it makes more sense, but it's still pretty hard. It's probably because the transitions between sections are not always obvious. (Most of them are, but a few are quite subtle.)
Again, I love your use of countermelody (:20 comes to mind) and I actually tried to apply the same ideas to my song because I liked it so much (with some success), though you do it with much more finesse.
I was having a block with your melodies before because the instruments are so cheapy sounding, and I feel like at times the notes are a touch too quantized. Like you have a ton of great melodic ideas (3:36 comes to mind), but the delivery seems a little too mechanical. Putting just the smallest touch of glide between two notes, tweaking the rhythms a little to be more swingy, and adding touches of vibrato might help. Plus, I know you're all about using the crappiest possible instruments (lol), and it usually works to great effect, but I think that using some slightly more organic sounds would add a lot to the expressivity.
Mega props on the insanely weird and interesting percussion work throughout the whole track. It's not chipdrums and yet it fits very well with the chippy sounds. The first time I heard it kick in I was like "what is going on and why does it sound awesome."
You know what this song really reminds me of? Cave Story music. Check out this song in particular: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRPijoprLU4 It's really similar to your song imo in terms of call/response, arrangement, weird melodies, etc. If you like it check out the whole OST, I bet you'll enjoy it.
Overall 5/5, 10/10 and I don't know how my song beat this, it's epic.
oh hey congratz man. im tired of reading long reviews or maybe its because i just got back from measles lolz so i only read the final part... though the music you linked me is cool i liked it thanks man!
Now that NGADM is over and the judges are finally done with complaining about my songs, I was looking forward to writing tons of scathing reviews on your guys' songs, so that I could FINALLY HAVE MY REVENGE!! But instead I found this amazing song which is practically perfect. Way to ruin my fun, you JERK.
No but really this piece is amazing. Those brass blasts are just so tasty. My only complaint is that repetitive string melody that plays on top of them. I also love that soaring vocal and the decidedly arabic feel of the melodies, which works without feeling cliche.
And at electric guitar too... just really well done all around.
JUDGEMENT ALL AROUND!
Thanks for the kind review johnfn. I'd probably do this a little differently now if we were to compose it today, and change some of our generic approaches. We wrote this nearly three years ago now that I think about it... man! Time flies.
I decided to listen to one of your thingies to somewhat pay you back for all the hard work you did on NGADM! I GET TO JUDGE THE JUDGES HAHAH (Um... and I realize that giving one skimpy review is hardly sufficient pay back... haha)
That beginning really took me aback. As bizarre and offputting as the glitching is, it's also refreshingly unique, so I like it.
The drums are really bizarre, but not in a jarring way. I really enjoy the open high hats (I think?) that fade in and out.
The mixing is really nicely done. Not much to complain about. The instrumentation is really unique. Futuristic, but in a way that is still essentially human.
The melodies need a lot of work though imo. They seem kinda random.
To be honest I wasn't very convinced by this song until about 2:00 when the acoustic guitar came in. I really liked that idea and wanted to hear a lot more of it. Maybe some sort of sweet futuristic jam idk.
So yeah. Trim other stuff, take acoustic guitar section and run with it because I love it. :)
Whoa! Sorry for such a late response. Thanks for the review, I appreciate it, dude :)
Dangg that composition is spot on. Sure, there a buncha little errors here and there, which I'm sure you know all about by this point, but I thought you'd just like to know that the melodies are seriously great.
You know what this reminds me of? Wind Waker. Particularly the sailing theme - it has that same sort of boundless optimism to it, which is something that I really enjoy in music.
You're actually one of my bigger influences on Newgrounds, because your specific brand of melodicism and your approach to music in general just really speaks to me. I hope to hear much more music from you. :)
I was specifically thinking of Wind Waker when I wrote the middle section with the bass melody. :D
Thanks so much for the review. I love writing melodically, but my production skills have a long way to go. I love the polish and detail in many of your tracks. Maybe we can learn from each other!
i always forget to respond to PMs. its not because i hate you, just because i forgot!!!
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