johnfn's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[All Systems Go!]

wow great stuff man!

[Battle Born]

great track! great writing, really mind bogglingly good production imho. so keep that in mind while i give you a ton of thoughts =P

a few thoughts:

i really liked the sighing vocals at 0:15 (and later on in the track too), and i wish they received more of a spotlight in the track (they might have been my favorite aspect). like what if there was an outro that looped them, then gradually adding other elements on top??

other thought is: i wonder if another genre would have suited this melody and progression better? your progression is really intricate and thoughtful, and the melodies are great too, and im not sure if such a high octane energy driven genre like metal fits them the best? i'm wondering if a more stripped down production that allowed the compositional elements to really take the focus would be more effective ???

last thought: the build into the chorus is always a bit underwhelming to me. i think that the biggest offender is 1:04, where the first time i was listening i legitimately had to consciously go "oh i guess this is the chorus now" because there's almost no change at all in energy =P the energy level is so consistent that it doesn't really register at all lol. 3:12 is a tad more effective, but it still has that problem to a large degree. either make the lead in 8 bars or so quieter before the chorus, or REALLY fill out the chorus with cymbals and stuff. a comparatively 'big energy' chorus would have done a LOT for this track imho.

anyway it's a great track! it's been a pleasure to see you guys refine your songwriting abilities over the years - the melodies in this one are super solid, and this song has such a tight arrangement, it's amazing =)

P.S. vocals are perfect volume this time bb ;-)

[Jealousy]

It's been a delight watching this one go through various stages of development. Congrats on probably my favorite NGADM track this year.

1:30 <3

McGorilla42 responds:

Thank you, John! <3 1:30 is just for you (I told the same to Jordi, but don't tell him)

[-Dark Matter-]

Really fun stuff. Man, you have such a great sense of groove.

Good luck against McGorilla, you'll need it!

[-Round 2-]

Yea the waterflame comparisons are really apt. Dude you really have a knack for using fun vocal samples in this track, both melodic and amelodic! The main thing that's holding you back is sound design imho, the sounds are mostly not so great (outside of the vocal chops obvi). Also it's a tad repetitive. Other than that, fun stuff. =)

[Alter Ego (Part 1)]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

It cracks me up that you say that this belongs in your epic music library, because I couldn't think of a better categorization. Very possibly one of the most epic tracks I've heard in this contest! The sound choice is totally there - gotta love those epic choirs drums! Some of the chord progressions are pretty intriguing as well.

However, if you want to make truly epic music, there's a few things you should work on for next time! First is definitely mixing. While the mix is definitely not /bad/ by any means, it could definitely do with some boosting in the drums! Also, your bass sounds a little muddy to me, like maybe some reverb got down there. It's always good to high pass your non-bass instruments to make sure that they're not muddying anything up!

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 3/4
Composition: 3/4
Sound Design: 3+/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 7.8

[Slimistry]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

This is a super cool little song! It kinda reminds me of like, a vg song for a ghost train, but a ... happy... ghost train?? Yeah, I dunno where I was going with that. Anyways, this is a fun little track. It has some fun rhythms and a cool atmosphere.

One big problem, however, is that is far too repetitive. The first 50 seconds or so all repeat the same idea without barely changing a thing! That's a big no-no. Much better would be to add additional sections, or just make it shorter. The eventual variation that you do add in is definitely appreciated, but would have been more effective it was a different progression or different backing rhythm. Also, like, the sound design could use some love - it sounds very fake. Better samples make a world of difference!

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 2/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 1+/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 6.0

[Rat In the Attic (Mix 2)]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Wow yea vocal song! Your vocals are pretty good for the most part, though I have to say that every now and then there's a word that you don't quite sing with the same force or that is slightly out of tune (like "do" in the first line), but overall your vocal quality is high and sounds great! The mix is still kind of weird, even though you said that you remastered this one - it has a lot of highs and the bass seems rather disproportionate. (Also the drum kit is pretty hard to hear.)

If I were to give advice to improve this song, I'd probably head in the direction of composition. While the composition definitely isnt /bad/, it kinda just... fell flat? Like it didn't really stand out or anything. It's hard to say why, part of it could simply be that it's hard to hear the chord progression and how it lines up with the vocals.

Arrangement: 3+/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 3/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 8.0

verbicidemusic responds:

Thanks for the review! That bass man... I really should've re-recorded it all together to be honest, as the initial tone I had was just impossible to work with, haha. And for a song like this that relies so much on the guitars being more coloration and mood establishment, the bass really needed to come out and act as the anchor more than it did. But that aside, I really appreciate the feedback and I'm glad you enjoyed my vocals as much as you did!

[The Time Traveller]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

This is a pretty enjoyable dnb tune! There are a lot of details that I really enjoy here, like the vocal motion and especially the cool vocal glitches! Definitely lots of details were put into your dnb. The melody too is also fairly enjoyable for being a dnb tune which are usually kinda amelodic...

My biggest problem with this track, though, is definitely the repetition. You repeated the same melodies far far too much, and it starts to get super old. I would strongly recommend cutting down this track, and/or adding additional sections so that it comes off as less repetitive. This track would be much better without all the repetition. Also, in terms of mixing, the bass really overwhelsms and saturates the entire song, so that's something to keep in mind.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 1/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 2+/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 6.6

[Voodoo Nightmares]

== This is an official NGUAC Review ==

Man, this track is all over the place!

Like, I'm really impressed by that sorta growly vox like synth that you have going in the drops, and I also really like the arpeggiated stuff that you lead off the song with. Those are both really cool. Your production sounds pretty impressive (with a few caveats); the drums and clap are loud for the most part.

However, this piece also has a number of large flaws to it. First of all, it is just far far too repetitive. Right now there are some sections that are just repeated way too much, like the aforementioned growly synth and the pluck melody. The other big problem with this track is that although the production sounds alright, something seems... off. It seems almost like it's clipping at points, but it's hard to put a finger on exactly what the problem is. Like 2:03 when the kick hits, that does NOT sound like a normal kick to me, it sounds very distorted.

So yeah, cool stuff, but needs to be trimmed down and whatever that kick is doing definitely sounds weird to me.

Mini-scores (not used to calculate final score in any way - just so you know what needs improvement):

Arrangement: 2/4
Composition: 2+/4
Sound Design: 3/4
Production: 2+/4

Overall: 6.7

UnavailableSurm responds:

Thank you, and I will most definitely improve!